A Gift of Grace

I love the word “grace.” The fact that I can receive something I don’t deserve is like receiving a present from a friend just because. It’s wonderful! When I was younger, my father demonstrated the true definition to me after I deliberately disobeyed him. He told me I deserved to be grounded, but after much sweating (on my part), he told me he was not going to ground me. He wanted to teach me about grace. And to this day, I’ve never forgotten that lesson, or how I felt when he told me.

While we try to teach our kids about grace, (along with love, mercy, kindness, and not talking to strangers), we often forget one very important thing. We also need to be shown grace, and from the one person we often forget—ourselves. In this season of my life, as I navigate parenting semi-adult children, I find myself reflecting on the parent I was to my younger kids. The memories, the successes, and the regrets. Lots of reflecting on the regrets and the “what-ifs”. What if I hadn’t done that? What if I hadn’t said that? Would anything be different? Better?

But as I reflect, I’ve been reminded of one very sweet thing. Jesus’ death for me. It is only by grace that I am saved. I didn’t deserve it, but God loved me more. He gave me grace once, and He’s given it to me every time I’ve repented. But I’m also learning how to receive it. And that means giving myself grace.

I hate to be the one to break it to ya, but you’re not going to be the perfect parent. You will mess up. At this point, you may say, “duh, Tracy.” But I honestly thought I’d be the best parent ever. Then as we received compliments from family and friends, my husband and I pat each other on the back. Great job! We did it! Pride goes before a fall, right? It’s not to say we didn’t do a good job, but we aren’t perfect parents by any means. Just realizing how far I had fallen from being today’s June Cleaver really brought me down, until I allowed myself to receive a gift. And this gift of grace has freed me to be who I really am—an imperfect human, striving to do the best that I can. This holiday season, I want to encourage you, if you’re holding on to unforgiveness against yourself as a parent, give yourself a gift!

Photo courtesy of Greg Weaver